Fake in India! Thugs of Hindostan to be pulled out of theatres

News you wish was true…

In a major relief for cinegoers across the country, the makers of Thugs of Hindostan have decided to withdraw the film from theatres and multiplexes in the wake of the atrocious critic reviews and livid public reactions the film has received.

The decision was taken following a meeting between the filmmakers and association of cinema owners, who were worried for the well-being of the viewers who were subjected to the horror experience. The producers of the film said the decision has been taken on humanitarian grounds, keeping the state of the public in mind.

Meanwhile, it has also been learnt that Aamir Khan and Amitabh Bachchan have agreed to issue a written apology on Twitter, expressing regret for subjecting the public through such trauma during the festive season. That’s not all, they have also mutually decided not to work with each other again.

Furthermore, director Vijay Krishna Acharya, whose Tashan and Dhoom 3 were said to be responsible for rise in headache ailments in the country, has finally decided to voluntarily retire from direction. (BTW Vijay Krishna Acharya is one person just like Neil Nitin Mukesh!)

According to unconfirmed sources, Deepika Padukone and Ranveer Singh headed to Italy for their wedding earlier than scheduled so that they would be spared the TOH torture. Also, Virat Kohli’s outburst at a fan, asking him to leave the country, was apparently because he was disturbed after being shown the movie pre-release.

In some more good news for the audience, cinemas and multiplexes have agreed to refund the ticket money to all those who want to claim it. That’s not all, as a post-Diwali gift, Badhaai Ho will be back in theatres instead of TOH. Ayushmann bhav!

(Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, meant for humour purposes only)